For A Rich, Long Life, Marry An Asian Person

Do you want a rich long life? Of course you do. It turns out that marrying an Asian person may give you the highest chance of outliving and out-earning most people. Let me share how I came to this conclusion.

After publishing my post on how life expectancy greatly depends on wealth and location, a couple of commenters asked whether I had factored in race as one of the variables. I did not.

Instead of factoring in race, I factored in household income, net worth, location, and social influences as to how we might be able to take action to live longer.

We Cannot Change Our Race, But We Can Choose Who To Be With

Given we are all born a certain race, we can't take action to change our race even if some races do live longer than others. So there was no point in me focusing on race.

I also don't like focusing on race because it might pit people against each other. Getting told your race isn't doing as well as another race is not encouraging. And getting told your race is doing better may give you a false sense of confidence. Subjective Personality scores by Harvard University promote more stereotypes, which is no good.

The advice on Financial Samurai is applicable to all races. I truly want everybody to achieve financial freedom sooner if they really want to. That's the beauty of sharing knowledge for free on the internet!

However, given I've got an open mind, I took a look at the life expectancy by race to see if I could connect more dots during Asian American Pacific Islander Heritage month every May.

U.S. Life Expectancy By Race

According to the National Center for Health Statistics, Asian people have the longest life expectancy at 83.5 years in America. Hispanics have the second longest life expectancy at 77.7 years, followed by Whites at 76.4 years, Blacks at 70.8 years, and American Indian/Alaska Native at only 65.2 years.

life expectancy by race

Based on the data, if you want a higher chance of living longer, be born Asian! If you are not Asian, then maybe you'll get luckier in the next life.

OK, if this advice rubs you the wrong way, now you know why I didn't include race in the variable on life expectancy. There's nothing you can do to change your race once you're born to extend your life. But there are things you can do once you know the data.

We all must ask ourselves how much is one year of life worth? The greater you value time, the more you will welcome the below strategies. It's just that by the time we start appreciating the value of time, we might be too old to change!

Tip: Compare affordable life insurance quotes in one place at PolicyGenius. If you have debt and dependents, getting life insurance is a must.

Marry An Asian Or Produce Offspring With An Asian Person

Although it might be too late for you, you can marry an Asian person who will hopefully live longer than you. Most of us would rather die before our life partners because it's emotionally less painful.

Another strategy for living longer is producing offspring with an Asian person. Although this strategy won't help you, you can help future generations potentially live longer. Helping your children may, in turn, help your legacy.

Given you aren't Asian, your child won't get the full benefit of the longer Asian life expectancy. But half the benefit is still about three years longer to live compared to the average life expectancy of the second longest-living race, Hispanics.

The problem with producing a child with an Asian person is that Asians only account for about 7% of the American population. As a result, Asians are relatively rare compared to Hispanics (19%), Blacks (14%), and Whites (62%). However, Asians are not as rare as Native Americans, who account for roughly 3% of the population, or Native Hawaiians, who account for only 0.5% of the population.

In order to increase your chances of getting together with an Asian person, live where there are the most Asians in America. You must be strategic!

Top 10 American Cities With The Most Asians As A Percentage Of The Total Population

As you can see from the chart below, if you want to increase your chances of finding an Asian life partner, move to Honolulu, Daly City, Fremont, Sunnyvale, Irvine, Santa Clara, Garden Grove, Torrance, San Francisco, or San Jose.

Hawaii and California are the two states with the most Asian people because they are the two states closest to Asia. It so happens that Hawaii and California also are two states with the highest life expectancies.

Top 10 American Cities With The Most Asians As A Percentage Of The Total Population

Once you know where the most Asian people live in America, it's time to understand what Asians care about the most. The more you can understand a person's culture, the easier it is to connect.

What Asians Care About So You Can Attract an Asian Person

If you want to marry an Asian person, it's important to learn about their specific customs and beliefs.

Asians are not a monolith, so make sure you understand their specific culture, i.e. Japanese, Taiwanese, Thai, Malaysian, Vietnamese, Indonesian, Hong Kongnese, Chinese, Cambodian, Indian, etc.

But in general, know that most Asians care about or emphasize:

  • Education (highest percentage who attend college)
  • Respect (filial piety, respecting one's elders)
  • Loyalty and stability (lowest divorce rates in America, homeownership)
  • Honesty (lowest crime rates in America)
  • Meritocracy (reward for hard work)
  • Financial stability (careful with debt, honors financial contracts, high saving rate, strong credit score)
  • Health (lowest obesity rate in America at 16.1%)

The more you care about the above seven things, the greater your chances of creating a life with an Asian person who will likely live longer than you and produce children that may also live longer.

Example Of A Cultural Difference

Here's an example that would mortify the vast majority of Asian people. Due to the importance of respect, Asian people would feel that leaving a mess in public is disrespectful to others.

Kids popcorn mess on an airplane, father Anthony Bass complaining, who is going to pick up after the kids
Clean up after kid on Airplane debate

Hopefully the flight attendants asked the pregnant mother to pick up the litter in a respectful way. Being pregnant and traveling with two kids is not easy.

However, Asian people would not expect a flight attendant to pick up after their kids. Instead, Asian parents would pick up the food, or more likely, the parents would tell their children to pick up after themselves! After all, if the children are old enough to operate electronic devices, they should know how to pick up their litter.

Leaving a place worse off than they found it is not the Asian way. There is a fear that if Asian people don't teach their kids respect early on, they will grow up to be entitled and disrespectful as adults. Dishonoring the family name would be a great travesty.

You could see Asian culture in action when Japanese fans picked up trash in the stadium after every World Cup soccer match.

https://twitter.com/espn/status/1595445069472886785?s=20

On the flip side, if you disrespect an Asian person, then an Asian person may feel more emotionally distraught or get much angrier than a non-Asian person.

But What About Income And Net Worth By Race?

OK, by now you are convinced that marrying or cohabitating with an Asian is a great idea. But what about the money aspect of it? After all, having more money generally provides more freedom and a better life.

Well, you'll be interested to know that Asians have the highest median income in America as well. The median income for Asians in 2019 was $98,174. Some of the reasons for having the highest income include a focus on education, a greater percentage of workers in STEM fields, and higher-income immigrants.

In 2024, the median income for all races is likely 10%-15% higher.

Income By Race

See the real median household income by race from 1967 to 2019 according to the U.S. Census Bureau.

Income by race

Here is more income by race data for 2021 by the U.S. Census Bureau.

Income by Race 2021

Income By Type Of Asian Person

Given Asians aren't a monolith, here is more granular data about income by type of Asian person, according to the Pew Research Center.

Hence, if you really want to optimize for income, you may want to marry an Indian person, followed by a Filipino, Japanese, Chinese, Korean, Vietnamese, etc. However, it's tough to break into Indian culture as they have a strong preference to marry other Indian people.

Income by Asian type in America, 2019

Net Worth By Race And Household Characteristics

Marrying a person who has a six-figure income will make life easier. But what about net worth? Here's the latest data on net worth by race according to the U.S. Census Bureau.

As you can see toward the bottom of the chart, the median net worth for Asians in America was $206,400 in 2019, the highest net worth among all races. This makes sense given Asians earn the highest income and emphasize saving for financial security. In 2024, the net worth by race figures are likely 20% higher.

Median wealth by race and household characteristics

The 745 average credit score for Asian Americans came in 11 points higher than White Americans, who have an average credit score of 734. Asian American scores also came in ahead of Hispanic and Black Americans, who average ratings of 701 and 677, respectively.

Although, based on new legislation that passed on May 1, 2023, a disproportionate amount of Asian people may have to pay higher mortgage fees. Hence, if you marry an Asian person, try to marry one with an 800+ credit score. Once you're in the 800+ range, you become a highly coveted borrower where banks often eat the higher fees to land your business.

The Richer You Are, The Longer You Want To Live

Based on the data, it sure looks like marrying an Asian person will increase your chances of becoming richer and living longer. Even if you don't get richer and live longer being with an Asian spouse, you might appreciate the stability, integrity, honesty, and integrity of Asian culture.

If you do win the lottery, financially, you will want to live as long as possible. This way, the present value of your net worth grows even larger. Can you imagine winning a billion dollars and then dying the next day? Bad luck!

Hedging against bad luck is one of the reasons why the best age to retire is between 40-45. 22-27 years after high school is long enough to build a comfortable nest egg. If you end up dying on the earlier side (~60), at least you'll have 15-20 years of maximum freedom.

If you are rich, don't take your good fortune for granted. Exercise daily, eat healthy, and use your money to get personal trainers, cooks, therapists, masseuses, and more professional help to improve the quality of your life.

A Richer Longer Life Is Within Your Reach

Here at Financial Samurai, we're trying to minimize bad luck by understanding the landscape and taking action. Given we already know the states with the highest life expectancies, for a rich long life, marry an Asian person who lives in Hawaii or California.

Life expectancy by state in America

If you can't find an Asian person who lives in Hawaii or California, find an Asian person from anywhere and relocate to Hawaii or California. If you can't afford to relocate to Hawaii or California, then you may want to relocate to a lower-cost state like Colorado, Nebraska, Minnesota, Iowa, or Wisconsin.

I still believe wealth, location, and social influences are the largest determinants of life expectancy. However, based on the data from the National Center for Health Statistics, race does seem to be a determinant in how long you live.

If you want a rich long life, now you've got a game plan to have one. And if you don't end up with an Asian person or have Asian children, that's OK too. There are so many things we can all do to improve our financial and life situation!

Reader Questions and Suggestions

How much do you think race plays a part in life expectancy? Why do you think Asians live the longest and have the highest income and net worth in America? What are some other strategies one can employ to live a rich long life?

Shop around for affordable life insurance quotes at PolicyGenius. You'll get multiple custom quotes in one place. My wife and I got new 20-year term policies with PolicyGenius during the pandemic and we feel more at peace. No matter where you live or how rich you are, life is not guaranteed.

Join 60,000+ others and sign up for the free Financial Samurai newsletter and posts via e-mail. Financial Samurai is one of the largest independently-owned personal finance sites that started in 2009. Marry An Asian Person is a FS original post. All rights reserved.

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Tingting
Tingting
1 year ago

Or just follow the general Asian way of living, study work hard, don’t do drugs, go to bed early, spend more time with family, find life partner with same value. It s not that hard lol

Hank Spraggins
Hank Spraggins
1 year ago

Umm… Maybe the data changed after you provided the link, but the Latino, Asian numbers much closer:

In 2019, overall life expectancy in years was 85.7 for the Asian population, 82.2 for the Latino population, 78.9 for the white population, 75.3 for the Black population, and 73.1 for the AIAN population.

Also, life expectancy is/was rising higher for Blacks from 2000 – 2019. Also, Latinos have faced a whole host of barriers to healthcare and yet they are near the highest life expectancy. That is interesting… Also, I thought Italians were very high on life expectancy bc of diet or climate – not sure if any research proceed causality.

Also, I’d ❤️ to see a breakdown of the Asian pop in America bc I’ve heard Vietnamese, Camodian, Filipino, and some other Asian subgroups are below average on those same statistics. Japanese and Chinese may have even higher life expectancies and income levels?

Also, considering the barriers faced by Asians in this country (too numerous to list) it’s even more amazing to see this data.

Jeff VA
Jeff VA
1 year ago

That tweet by Bass…wow. The level of entitlement is unreal.

Annie F
Annie F
1 year ago

As a poster said, it’s about values and you will see that in every group.
The data among Asians might be skewed for immigrants in CA in particular
I could easily point to the data showing that about 43.8 percent of African immigrants achieved the most college degrees, compared to 42.5 percent of Asian-Americans, 28.9 percent for immigrants from Europe, Russia and Canada and 23.1 percent of the U.S. population as a whole.

All those points raised by Sam would be true of the Nigerian or Ghanaian immigrant population as well as Caribbean immigrants for the most part.

Todd
Todd
1 year ago

It’s not race. It’s values. We’re a conservative Catholic “White” family that places a high value on all of the attributes you cite in this article for happiness and longevity. I think you’d find cohorts of exactly these values in every ethnic group, but taken on the average, a large sample size will tend to revert to the mean.

Robertson
Robertson
1 year ago

This is an odd take on data. US gets the cream of the crop from Asia lured by our universities. Lots of poverty and crime in Asia with lower life expentancy but they never make it here.
Marrying an Asian doesnt magically change a person. Better to emulate the value on education and support network.

Lyndon Remias
Lyndon Remias
1 year ago

Woot woot! Filipino in the house!

Bret
1 year ago

I’m white and married to a Pacific Islander. They have an amazing family-oriented culture, similar to Asian and I have learned a lot over the past 33 years. Unfortunately, western food has devastated the population of my wife’s country and obesity rates have skyrocketed. Back in the 80s, when I first went there, the people were much more trim and healthier. Of course, Americans were also more trim and healthier back in the 80s too. But processed food has really affected the islander population and it is sad to see.

Joe
Joe
1 year ago

I suspect the data will normalize after more time. Maybe in 100 years. The data are probably driven up by recent immigrants. I mean within 2-3 generations. The Asians who have been here for 4-5 generations are assimilated. The culture of striving immigrants disappears. Maybe less so in Hawaii and CA where there are more Asian residents. Just IMO.

Ginger
Ginger
1 year ago

I totally agreed with the first comment from Simple Money Man, Parents/Guardians. They set the tone for their Kids or Dogs ( LOL). Whenever I see children acting up or teenagers acting badly you can always go back to their Parents and how they were raised. Everything said above applies being Asian but it can also apply if you are not Asian. It just take more focus whereas coming from an Asian family it is more instill in our DNA. IMO, this is one of the main reason our Country has gone down the tubes, Family Values ! For all Races. This is still the best Country but it is going away FAST.

Simple Money Man
1 year ago

In my humble opinion, it all comes down to parenting. Generally and I mean generally speaking (cause there’s always exceptions), Asian parent’s are harder, stricter, and don’t compromise when it comes to teaching hard work, respect and discipline to their kids. Sure we give them love, but rules are rules bottom line. These values mentioned translate to high level of achievements in many things (education, career, health, good behavior). When the kids become older they realize the dividends these values have paid and carry it forward to their own kids.

Simple Money Man
1 year ago

In my observation other races may value freedom too much for their kids’ right to say and do what they please. In the case for parenting, when you allow your kids too much freedom, it may be a contradiction to what you want them to say or do as a caring and responsible parent, who has their best interest at heart. I hope that makes sense.

C
C
1 year ago

A lot of the traits are mostly from cultural practices depending on which country one resides. For e.g. cleaning after within a stadium is found only within the Japanese and not present in any other Asian societies in general.

N
N
1 year ago

I think a big argument is nurture versus nature.
Genes are includes on nature. Still- I think like investing- one has to capitalize on their strengths and minimize their weaknesses. I do hope healthcare costs go down. It is a bigger and bigger percentage of all economies. I actually became a part time caregiver at age 42. I turned my life around. I am in my late 50s now, and I read one of the comments. I will edit it- I hope to have a great healthspan until I am at least 100 and pass with a legacy that will be talked about for generations.

Steve Letro
Steve Letro
1 year ago

The 2019 study found Native Hawaiians have 62.2 years of healthy life expectancy, compared with 75.9 years for Chinese, 74.8 for Japanese, 73.3 for Filipinos, and 72.1 years for Caucasian Hawaii residents.

My German mother 95 killed in Buffalo NY hospital from positve PCR test resulting in 14 day quarintine, no visitors and starved to death as per death certificate. Mother vaxxed in memory care fell so off to hospital for check up, OK. BUT the hospital imprisoned mother for 14 days and did not make sure a memory care patient ate. Key to long life no hospitals or mind controlled medical dumb azzes. My wife a retired OBGYN knew from late 2019 the scamdemic was mind control.
My Polish mother in law going strong at 96, no vax and no medical contact.

TURN OFF all media we are MSM free since first gulf bushie war for oil.

Alvin
Alvin
1 year ago

Interesting article, Sam.

Black guy here. To answer your question, I believe personal behaviors and practices play a more important role than your race.

But your article brings up a cool scene I saw in a series called “Billions” where they were discussing life expectancy. It went something like this:

– Dying in your 30’s or 40’s – A tragedy
– Dying in your 50’s – A shame
– Dying in your 60’s – Gone too soon
– Dying in your 70’s – A life well lived
– Dying in your 80’s or 90’s – A hell of a ride!

CMAC
CMAC
1 year ago
Reply to  Alvin

Completely agree. Environment is believed to be responsible for 85-90% of one’s longevity, conversely genetics making up only 10-15%. You can not control the genes you were born with but through exercise and healthy eating you can alter your gene expression (epigenetics). The geneticist and a leading researcher on the science of aging, David Sinclair (Harvard Unv), has a very interesting pod series on this subject matter.

Visen
Visen
1 year ago

Interesting, looks like a similar life expectancy to the average of the EU.
After having lived in the EU and mostly Spain (which has an 84 years average life expectancy currently) for 6 years, it’s not surprising.

Just thinking of re-visiting the cookie cutter US suburban sprawl or tent ridden cities brings shivers.

Alan
Alan
1 year ago

I was on a flight from Tokyo to Tahiti several years ago sitting next to an older man from Japan. I remember him commenting about a Chinese couple that was sitting in bulkhead and how they were making a mess out of the plane with their trash, etc. So I would have to say that your example can apply to Asians as well.
I believe much of the issue depends upon the culture of the country in question. As an example, I remember visiting a park near the US border in Mexico. There was a group of Hispanics from Texas who were drinking and throwing their beer cans and bottles everywhere except the trash cans. I asked them why and they claimed that someone else would clean it up. I asked if they would do the same in Texas and they replied that of course not, because the police could fine them there.

Jake
Jake
1 year ago
Reply to  Alan

There’s a lot of new money from China, as a result, Chinese tourists have developed a poor reputation around some parts of the world.

I take it you’re a white guy who doesn’t live in America anymore?

Alan
Alan
1 year ago
Reply to  Alan

Yes, I have not lived full time in the US since 1995 and have no desire to return. Prior to the pandemic I traveled most of the year – I was in China in November 2019. For the pandemic I spent most of my time in Mexico and watched in horror how the rest of the world reacted. Mexico remained open to everyone with zero entry requirements. There were local restrictions but we still were able to travel throughout the country for months on end. Having recently traveled to Europe and the Middle East it was interesting to share experiences

Jean
1 year ago

Ok…I kinda read the post and wondered if I was also reading abit of satire/sarcasm.

I appreciate some of the recent metrics, since I’m Chinese-CAnadian. I do believe IF (and it’s a big if), the person adopts large portion of their diet to be traditional Asian, it helps lower obesity long-term or at least for a few decades. It doesn’t matter if the person is poor or wealthy, lifelong good food choices and some walking often, helps alot.

I just hope the 3rd, 4th generations will carry on –motivated to be healthy, to learn in their careers, etc.

CMAC
CMAC
1 year ago

I agree that Asians are not a monolith. There are significant differences in sub culture depending on where in Asian you are from (in particular, SEA vs non-SEA). I’m white and my significant other is Laotian. We’ve been together for over 13 years and have amazing children together. Although she checks some of the boxes you mentioned that are commonalities among Asian people (education: she immigrated the US at age 7 unable to speak english yet now she is a successful physician), my goodness she definitely missed the mark on some of the others! She’s never met a dollar she’s liked, and for every one she earns she likes to spend two. She also has an unhealthy attraction to casinos and gambling. The louder and gliztier the slot machine the more money and time she will donate to it. This is not just her personality trait but endemic in her immediate family and the vast majority of her SEA extended family and friends. I’ve discussed these issues with her and she states in her culture their general view is “why save money when you can die tomorrow.” Therefore, I think you need to consider adding Addiction to Gambling Gene to your list of common Asian personality traits. I kid of course (but not really). My sense is this type of belief system is more common in societies with lower socioeconomic status whether you are comparing Asian sub-cultures, European sub cultures, or here in the Americas as well. So if your reader base is now more interested in finding an Asian to wed, I’d recommend a more nuanced approach to finding a mate and/or partner.

CMAC
CMAC
1 year ago

Her story is both inspirational and tragic. She encapsulates everything America stands for (positives and negatives). She escaped Laos at age 4 with her family and lived in a Thai refugee camp for 3 years before coming to the US at age 7. In school she worked her tail off to learn the language and excel. Valedictorian in high school and eventually onto med school. That is the inspirational part. The tragedy is she is a financial disaster. After almost 20 years as a physician, her personal net worth is likely close to zero. She is buried under credit card debt and still has school debt. Her 401k is anemic to say the least and her monthly cash flow is close to zero or negative most months. No amount of financial therapy and education from me has helped what so ever. She also refuses to see a professional financial planner. A core Asian belief, per her report, is the children will provide for the parents when she retires. She also holds the belief that having tremendous debt throughout her life is fine because she will eventually die and the debt will disappear.

CMAC
CMAC
1 year ago

I’ve been successful in curtailing her gambling except when her family visits from out of town. However, I have not been able to constrain her continual consumerism all other times. She earns a lot of money but spends almost everything she makes, every year. I was wise enough early on in our relationship to understand that she will never stop spending and never develop healthy financial habits. Therefore, I’ve never commingle our finances and am legally distanced and protected from her financial choices. I’m in my mid 40’s but have been financially independent for several years now. My semi-passive and passive income streams from real estate investments more than cover living expenses for me and my children. To be a positive role model for my children and bring “financial balance” to my household, I still work part time and save/invest 100% of my income. Despite my kids being in early grade school I teach them about finances all the time and tell them I am going to write a book to educate people on finances titled “Rich Dad, Poor Mom”

CMAC
CMAC
1 year ago

It’s a good thought but her issues run deeper and longer than the time frame I have been in her life. When I meet her she had six figure credit card debt (not including car payments or med school loans) and pulled out a lot of money out of her 401k to live it up in Las Vegas with her sister when she was moving from LA to the mountain state we now live in. I tried to get her to read a great book titled “Buy This, Not That” but that didn’t go over so well. Like I said, it’s tragic .

Valerie
Valerie
1 year ago
Reply to  CMAC

Hi. I don’t mean to interfere but I wanted to share a perspective based on my former spouse who was white, born in Africa and who had to leave at 3 due to a coup d’etat and who then landed in EU, learned a new language and started over. His family lost everything and had such tragedy in their lives. When money was made somehow success was sabotaged. My sense is that early family trauma has far-reaching impacts on biology and behavior. Just a theory. I ended up keeping my money separate and have deep compassion. I guess we all have our lessons. Thanks.

CMAC
CMAC
1 year ago
Reply to  Valerie

Interesting. I agree childhood trauma likely plays a role as well. Thanks for sharing your experience and insight.

Steve Letro
Steve Letro
1 year ago

CMAC In my experience the behaviors you describe are MD behaviors. Better known as I can always make more money. Never take investment guidance from a MD, engineer or rich person. My wife is a retired OBGYN. Do not even get me started on the horrible morals and habits of male OBGYNs. Always looking for the next girl friend during examination. UG I some ways your wife is right she worked like a dog in college, medical school and residency. Now suprise the working like a dog continues until the day she retires. A good friend is OBGYN with extra 4 year fellowship in ocology. He says my brother with 4 year degree in business makes more as stock broker. Life is not fair. I made a wonderful living as chief chemist at electric company.

CMAC
CMAC
1 year ago
Reply to  Steve Letro

I think there is some truth to the ” I can always make more money” line of thought. She will often justify increased spending by picking up additional shifts. She can’t see that it is an endless cycle of spinning her finacial wheels but leaves her with less time to spend with the kids or with family activities.

Woody
Woody
1 year ago

White guy here but I was raised to meet the qualities you described about the Asians above. I married a Filipina woman. I was raised in So Cal from middle class parents, she’s from Philippines and moved here as an adult with working class parents. We live in the suburbs of Las Vegas and both work in healthcare. I’d say there is one thing that her family does different than my white family. I also notice it at work as I am in healthcare. In my experience Asians are more family oriented and communal. Many whites are a bit more distant and individualistic. Asians will move into together and take care of their extended family. White people say “you’re a grown man we don’t want to burden you”. Cultural expectations are just different.

Derek
Derek
1 year ago

I think we can all adopt a little more of these traits if we want to become richer and live longer.

* Education (highest percentage who attend college)
* Respect (filial piety, respecting one’s elders)
* Loyalty and stability (lowest divorce rates in America, homeownership)
* Honesty (lowest crime rates in America)
* Meritocracy (reward for hard work)
* Financial stability (careful with debt, honors financial contracts, high saving rate, strong credit score)
* Health (lowest obesity rate in America at 16.1%)

Seems straightforward, but for someone reason, people don’t. Not sure why.

It would be great if schools and the government focuses more on the positives of Asian culture to help educate those who are struggling the most.

Kevin
Kevin
1 year ago
Reply to  Derek

I’ve wondered this as well. It’s certainly possible, but seems very much that the barriers a culture provides as protection are also walls that keep you from escaping. Changing culture means leaving your old culture behind first, including everyone who was a part of that culture.

That’s not easy to do, it’s no guarantee of success, and sometimes, there’s no going back.

cantor
cantor
1 year ago

I have noticed that white teenagers have no respect for elders in general. I am an asian in 50s and go outdoors for running. There is this group of high schoolers nearby who spoke with me in a way that I considered insulting. For no reason, one of them invited me to play boxing with them. The others around cracked jokes. I almost felt that their parents did not teach them how to talk to adults. Back where I come from, if I just tell their elders, the boys would get punished for the behavior. After the jog, an African American teen ager had a conversation where he addressed me as ‘sir’. Enough to tell the difference the culture makes in a single day. As it is, I view American social fabric broken with no emphasis on family values. But in addition it appears that to society doesn’t teach the manners to interact with the elders. Perhaps too much to expect in these times.

cantor
cantor
1 year ago

I did and told them to mind their business. I also asked them if that’s how they interact with their father since perhaps I am older than their father. I could not see the coach or any adult around unfortunately. I cam back and asked my own kids who are elder than these teenagers and they told me they have never indulged in these kind of incidents and also told mostly white kids pull these kind of things. Yes, it’s an anecdotal observation and I am generalizing too much. But hey, this is what I experienced first hand.

Honestly, if I were asked to make a guess, I would have thought exactly other way around. Since media keeps blasting us with how African Americans neighborhoods have issues. So naturally I would associate high probability of associating bad behavior to the African American kids. But what I experienced was something else altogether.

Will
Will
1 year ago

What happened to “when the fed destroys the middle class” article? It’s not like you to take posts down, especially when received so well. Were you pressured to remove it?

Canadian Reader
Canadian Reader
1 year ago

There is evidence that longer life spans are related to reduced fertility rates. While a controversial topic, sometimes I wonder what winning really means.

Eric
Eric
1 year ago

Hi Sam, I feel like you’ve discovered my (accidental) secret! My last long relationship was with a lovely woman born in Taiwan but raised in Philadelphia! I loved the closeness of her family and the focus on respect and merit. That relationship failed unfortunately but a couple years ago I met the most intelligent woman I’ve ever met and we are still together and going strong. She was born in Vietnam but raised in Sydney Australia. Again, I really like the respectful approach she takes towad others and how character and merit guide her judgment. I live in San Diego and work in tech so I have lots of exposure to Asian people. However, I honestly do not have a “type.” My ex wife has Scandinavian ancestry like me and we have awesome kids together that turned out so well I feel undeserving of them! I’m not the type to pursue a mate really, I typcially make sure the other person is truly interested before I put myself out there, and for some reason Asian women have been quite bold expressing to me their interest so I suppose that makes it easier to just say yes to dating them. I’m no chick magnet haha, but this has happened often enough that it’s a real pattern. One curious thing I’ve encountered a few times actually is Asian moms steering their daughter AWAY from Asian men because they fear that they tend to be “momma boys” or lazy spouses with an entitlement chip on their shoulder. Unfair stereotype certainly but I really have seen this specifically at least three times. I have just entered decummulaton mode so have to get busy planning.some adventures! Thanks for your writing, you always have well reasoned points and I really appreciate you for that.

Eric
Eric
1 year ago

So you’re saying my perspective may be skewed because of course dating itself is fundamentally a biased activity toward one’s preferences! Another of your well reasoned points taken!

Reasons for my divorce are a long story but we remain friendly and focus on effectively coparenting so I feel very fortunate for how it all turned out actually.

Jim
Jim
1 year ago
Reply to  Eric

I’ve actually heard some Asian parents guide their kids away from white people given some white people are less hygienic, disrespectful, and entitled. Example of the white man angry about the airline stewardess, asking his wife to pick up the litter they made is a perfect example.

So then to marry a white person who has already been divorced is a red flag that most Asian people would avoid. So I suspect money and more opportunity may be involved. Because no rational woman would marry an older divorcee.

So consider yourself lucky I don’t take your wife for granted!

Eric
Eric
1 year ago
Reply to  Jim

No rational woman would marry an older divorcee? Evidence to the contrary is overwhelming. In fact many women red flag middle aged guys never married, i.e., “something must be wrong!” Also, every woman I’ve dated seriously has been a professional making a very comfortable living so they certainly don’t need my help to get ahead. Re being personally hygienic, I think the only stereotype that may hold a little water is men being generally less so than women, haha.